Why Self-Care Isn’t Selfish: Reframing How We Look After Ourselves.
When you hear the words "self-care," what comes to mind?
For some, it conjures up images of luxury spa days or bubble baths. For others, it stirs up guilt — as if taking time for yourself is somehow indulgent, or worse, selfish.
But here’s the truth: Self-care isn't selfish. It's survival.
Looking after your own needs isn’t about being self-centred. It’s about recognising that you’re human. You have limits. You have needs. And when you honour those needs, you not only feel better in yourself — you show up better for the people around you too.
Why We Struggle With Self-Care
Many of us grew up with the belief that "being good" means putting others first, no matter what. We learned to ignore our tiredness, swallow our feelings, and keep giving even when our tank was running on empty.
But constantly ignoring your own needs doesn't make you stronger. Over time, it can lead to burnout, resentment, or even physical illness.
Self-care is not a reward for working hard enough or pleasing everyone around you. It's a fundamental part of maintaining your emotional, mental, and physical health.
Self-Care Can Be Simple
Self-care doesn’t have to be elaborate or expensive. Often, it's the small daily habits that make the biggest difference:
Saying no when you need to.
Taking five minutes to breathe and ground yourself.
Getting enough sleep.
Eating food that nourishes you.
Spending time with people who lift you up, not drain you.
Letting yourself rest without guilt.
It’s about making choices that honour your well-being, even when life is busy.
If You're Not Ready for Big Changes, Here Are Some Things to Consider
Sometimes the idea of overhauling your life can feel overwhelming. And that’s okay. You don’t have to make huge changes overnight.
Here are a few gentle starting points:
Check in with yourself daily. Ask, "What do I need today?" It could be something small, like a quiet moment with a cup of tea.
Give yourself permission to rest. Even ten minutes of genuine downtime matters.
Set one small boundary. Maybe it's turning off work emails after 6pm or carving out one evening a week that's just for you.
Celebrate small wins. Taking a break, speaking up for yourself, getting outside — these are all acts of self-care worth noticing.
Self-care isn’t about being perfect. It’s about recognising you’re worth the effort — exactly as you are, right now.
And If You Feel You Need Support
If you're finding it hard to make space for yourself, or if life feels overwhelming, you're not alone. At ATC Counselling Services, we offer a safe, non-judgmental space where you can reconnect with yourself and explore what you need to feel stronger.
You deserve care, too.
ATC Counselling Services – Where Trust Meets Healing.